Fun with random strangers.

Last night I was bored and discovered http://www.omegle.com and decided to see what kinds of fun I could have with random strangers.  The first five or ten people were boring and uneventful, but there was one guy in particular who kept going with my nonsense.  I decided to see how long I could keep him going and this is the result:


 You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

You: hello stranger

Stranger: ya

Stranger: from

You: what if we weren't actually strangers

You: and we like somehow randomly knew each other in real life

You: wouldn't that be fucked up?

Stranger: its strange to 2 meet each other

Stranger: ya

You: well its a good thing that isn't the case

You: you might be a serial killer or something

You: how do I know?

Stranger: i m an engineer

You: what sort of things do you engineer?

You: murders?

Stranger: no dear i m IT engg

You: ohhh

Stranger: what @ u?

You: well thats good

You: I'm unemployed

Stranger: from?

You: well I pretty much just don't work. It's not that i can't work or something. I'm just lazy and choose not to work. I just bum money off of other, hard-working people.

You: it's a lucrative trade

Stranger: ya

Stranger: i m search job

You: that sucks

You: jobs are for poor people

Stranger: ya

Stranger: i m doing my own business still

You: I need to do my own business too

You: omg wtf was that?

You: i just heard a loud boom outside of my house

Stranger: whats that?

You: I don't know! Let me look out the window and I'll tell you...hold on a sec

Stranger: ok but tell me that from where u r?

You: I'm from a small island off the coast of the northern United States

Stranger: oh gooe

Stranger: good

You: let me look outside

Stranger: ok

You: holy shit! Something crashed on the island!

Stranger: what is that?

You: I know you're not gonna believe me but I swear it looks like some sort of UFO or spaceship or somethig

Stranger: oh god send me photos of that

You: I don't have a camera

You: i wish I did

You: i'd send this shit to the news!

Stranger: oh

You: my neighbor just came running up to my door and said something about a hatch opening on it...i'm a bit frightened now

Stranger: u dont have mobile?

You: I accidentally dropped my phone in the water when I was on the beach yesterday

Stranger: thats bad

You: yeah

You: ok let me look out the window again

You: i gotta see whats going on with this thing

You: HOLY SHIT!!!

Stranger: so whats going on?

You: ok...this...this is fucking insane.

Stranger: whats ur name?

You: I couldn't quite make out what it was because its a bit dark but some sort of man or creature or something has emerged from the apparent spaceship that crashed on the island

You: my name is Bartholomew

You: people call me Mew

Stranger: age?

You: OMG THAT IS NOT A FUCKING MAN! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!

You: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING!??!?!

You: i'm 23

You: I know this sounds crazy but I swear its true

You: i'm freaking the fuck out right now

You: i've never seen anything in my life that looks like this creature

You: i just simultaneously pissed and shit myself a minute ago when I looked out the window. I had to completely change clothes and take a quick shower

Stranger: m/f

You: f

Stranger: ok still i want 2 go

Stranger: r u in fb?

You: no

You: dude there is a fucking alien creature on this island and you're asking about goddamn Facebook?

You: are you serious right now?

Stranger: but i wann go outside

You: well so do I but if I do i'll get murdered by this fucking alien

Stranger: take care dear

You: wait

You: you're gonna leave me?

You: you're my only hope of survival!

Stranger: if u want 2 contect than add me on fb

You: fine. Go outside. I'm gonna do my best not to get murdered by this alien. Where do you live? I'm sending this motherfucker to your house next since you won't help me. I'll tell him to look for you outside.

Stranger: thanx

Stranger: i m at australia

You: ok good

You: have fun outside.

You: the alien is coming for you

You: and he's bringing his friends.

Stranger: hahahahaaa

You: they're gonna murder you and all of australia

You: and probably mexico

You: and maybe a lil bit of canada

Stranger: thanx

Stranger: u r mad?

You: well there's a fucking horrible alien creature outside my house and all you can think about is Facebook and going outside

You: so I'm not happy

Stranger: so what can i do for u tell me darlling

You: no, its too late

You: the alien is beating on my door now

Stranger: i can pray for u

You: i'll be dead in a few minutes

Stranger: oh good

You: he'll probably fuck my corpse

You: and experiment on it or something

You: i hope you're happy with yourself

Stranger: ya but u r going to hell?

You: well I'm sure that being murdered and fucked by an alien doesn't qualify me for a one-way ticket to heaven

Stranger: oh

You: and its all your fault

You: you could have saved me

Stranger: why?

Stranger: how?

You: but you kept wasting time with all that talk of Facebook and going outside

You: and it gave the alien time to get to me

Stranger: ok send alien at me

Stranger: i can handle

You: i don't think you can

You: he looks mean and angry

You: he would probably murder you and fuck your corpse too

Stranger: i sware i can

You: and then shit in your mouth

You: he's a spiteful alien

Stranger: hahahhahaHH

Stranger: ya

You: I can tell by the way he walks

Stranger: me 2

You: goddammit why are you laughing?

Stranger: k

You: this is a serious matter

You: this alien is now halfway through my door

You: OMG ITS IN MY HOUSE

You: HOLY FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger: dear dont afraid of them

Stranger: pray 2 god

You: wHo iS tHiS?

Stranger: god?

Stranger: love u dear

You: i aM DrOrk AlBaStErOn oF ThE PlAnEt MeSxTRsL

You: YoU WiLl ObEy ME PaThEtiC HuMaN

Stranger: bye now i must have 2 go

You: I HaVe MuRdErEd ThE OnE YoU CaLl DeAr

Stranger: love u take care

You: LoVe?

You: WhAt Is ThIs ThInG YoU CaLl LoVE?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Poor guy.